My Goal

As many of you know I have been having some health problems for a long while now, especially in the last couple of years. For over 8 months now I have had some major MAJOR female problems with my cycle and hormones. I thought I was going to have to have a hysterectomy which is the very last thing I want to do but, felt I was running out of options. Since we just moved I could not get into a doctor until the end of June. I began to pray for me to see someone, anyone who could help me. I knew I could not wait 2 1/2 months so my best friend Shelly helped me find Dr. Secklinger online. Thank you Shelly!! XOXOX He is in a city not too far away and so I made an appointment.

I have been seeing Dr. Secklinger, ND/nutritionist (love him) for over a month now and I am feeling much better. :) He has taken a lot of things out of my diet: no gluten, wheat, dairy, yeast or sugar. So basically, I can eat vegetables, fruits and meat (of course no pork). If you would of told me that a month ago I would no longer crave sugar or chocolate; I would of told you that you were crazy! I could not live with out chocolate! I gasp as I say I don't care if I ever have it again. *GASP* Yeah I know your freaking out right now especially if you know me. MIRACLE!! Many cannot believe that I made it 3 days. lol!! That's okay I can't either!

Even after the first week, my symptoms began to dwindle. I am already off all my medication!! No asthma meds., no acid reflex meds. no artificial progesterone... I am taking the supplements and vitamins he suggested so, yes Mom, I am getting my vitamins. ;) I feel ten years younger! I have only had one headache the second day of detox and it was not too bad. I just laid down for a while and it was done. My stomach problems have lessened, my cycle is starting to straighten it self out and I am even starting to even sleep better. I know it will take a while to get there and I am okay with that. I don't own a scale so I do not know how much weight I have lost but, my pants hang on me and are about to fall off. I don't want to go buy new clothes just yet cause I will just have to buy more when I lose more. So I am hanging on to what I have until I can no longer wait.

My goal is to be healthy, though I know that will happen as I go. Everything else is a bonus!! I am to eat like this for 120 days and I have less than a 100 to go. (It takes 120 days to get all new red blood cells.) Though I wouldn't mind if this is the way I had to eat for the rest of my life so I quit counting the days. Though I do spend more on produce and meat, my grocery bill is not bad at all. I know many people think I am crazy; some saying I am going too extreme. Though I cannot seem to care. No offense. :) I still have bad days and hard times but, looking forward to what is to come. I'm starting a new season in life and really enjoying the journey! Thank you for those showing their support, calls, emails, advise and prayers. They mean so much to me!! I love you all!!

"...let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, ² fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God" - Hebrews 12:1-2

" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." -Philippians 4:13

Reference:
image from: http://www.adventurepostoffice.com/cards/thoughts/scripture/s30.jpg

Bitter Sweet Mother's Day

               This week has been a rough one so, I knew that this weekend might be just as rough. This morning I woke up with a headache but went ahead to get ready for church service. As I played worship music and did my hair, I began to cry a little but when I went to go get into the car, it was really raining and the tears begin to fall. I got in the car and realized that I had a text from my mother-in-law wishing me a Happy Mother's Day and such a sweet note. I began to cry as hard it was raining. I was thankful that I did not put on make up yet. I got to the red light to turn to go to church and realized that I could not stop so, did not go and I went on to my Grandma's house.

                Today is Mother's Day! It is a hard and bitter sweet day! Day I love to celebrate my mother and the mother figures in my life, it is also a hard day missing my little ones. It's hard to realize that we would have teenagers now. One that would have a driver's license and two in high school, two preteens and a toddler in tow. Though I can see their faces and hear their laughs it is hard to imagine my empty house full of youngins'. It makes me laugh and cry at the same time.

Steven Austin-
'96- would 16 years old

Mary Dawn-
'98- would be 14 years old

Patrick Issac-
'00- would be 12 years old

Chasen James-
'01- would be 11 years old

Mercy Leigh-
'02- would be 10 years old

Shalom Marie-
'09 - would be 3 years old


                Today is the day I honor my children. Today's verse from my daily devotion touched my heart and reminded me the hope I have.

"And now he has made all of this plain to us by the appearing of Christ Jesus, our Savior. He broke the power of death and illuminated the way to life and immortality through the Good News."
- 2 Timothy 1:10

                   It's was like God tapping me on the shoulder asking me if I remember the dream He gave me of our children. That they are happy and content with my Lord excited for when He calls me home. Because of Him and His sacrifice I will be with them when that time comes. Thank you LORD for taking care of my children and taking care of me. Giving me peace and comfort in the midst of this storm. Mother's Day is bitter because the loss that is felt is great; it is sweet to know the promises of Christ will always stay the same.

                  

God gives the desires of your heart...

               Many times we might  second guess if God loves us or wants good things for us because, our dreams, wants, and desires seem to just pass by with everyone else living their big dreams. Ever since I was a child I have wanted to move back home to Georgia. At 18 I had friends buy me plane tickets, told me they would drive out to get me, even one friend who had a run to California and stopped by to see if I wanted a ride back. But none felt right, and I never went.

                I then met a guy who became my best friend, fell head over heels in love with my Beloved Aaron and then we got married. That was 12 wonderful years ago. I cannot believe it's been 12 years, seems like it was yesterday and at the same time has flown by and that we have been together forever. Now I realize why I never left. I love my Red!!

               We have been looking on moving over the last few years  to where he is working, but it just doesn't work right now.  His work is always moving and being very expensive to live there in oil country (as well as very cold in North Dakota - no thank you -40 F degrees :b). We then decided that we would think and pray about Georgia, being more affordable for us to live as well as some where I felt safe and love to be. For over 8 months we thought, researched and prayed about it. God gave us the answer;  it is time to move. I have been watching Malissa's kiddos (which I so enjoyed!!) while she has been in school and know that she is done,  and I'm out of school for 3 weeks, it is now the time to go. I know that many do not agree with our decision, some even stopped talking to us. Which makes us very sad. :( I hope they realize we love them and care about them. It is time to Trust in God; when He says it is time, it's time.

                So on April 3rd, 2012 is the day that we moving early am. Please come see us in the next few days before we leave. We want to give hugs and luvs before we hit the road. We will be traveling across country to Georgia to begin a new adventure together. I can't wait!! So excited!! I know that God has a big plans for us!!
      

            We may not know what lies ahead but we know the Guide, we know that He has laid the path, and we trust in Him that leads each of our steps. God knows the desires of our heart. He knows the best plan and time for that plan and His plan is bigger and better than anything we can imagine!

            I will miss our family, our friends, our church family, and even these beautiful red dirt mountains which I have so grown to love. My dear sister Malissa says such a true point that I will have some day on my wall, "No matter where you are; you will always miss someone. Love has No boundaries". That is so true!

             So please know we love you soooo much!! That we will love you forever and will remember you always. That Georgia is not that far away and you are always welcome to come to visit and we will be back to visit y'all with a big southern accent. :) We will be back in October for a visit and every six months. Thank you for you support! It means so much to us!! We love Y'all!!

 



Sources:
Dream picture: www.cyber-nation.com
Love i fell picture: http://www.scenicreflections.com/media/263219/I_Fell_In_Love_Wallpaper/
moving boxes picture: http://fantasticmovers.com/page/3/
state plates map: http://www.movingacrosscountry.org/
my love has no boundaries: http://www.meredo.com/image/1177/my-love-has-no-boundaries.html

Ooooo Lala LOVE!!

For our 12th Wedding Anniversary we went to Sand Hallow Lake 

and went camping in style in my Dad's 5th wheel. So nice! 

All weekend long we just relaxed and really did nothing!! 

What a blessed weekend!! Woot Woo!!!

                                                      Petals and Kisses show the way!

                                                       Kisses always points the way ;)

                                                               What matters most?!!

                                                                    Oooooo Lala!!!!

                                                        The sunsets were breath taking!!

                                                                       Lake view.

                                                                  Red Hot Sunset!!

                                                                 My Red relaxin'!!!
Sources:
I will always love you no matter what.

 picture: http://www.makeadare.com/dare/it-okay-still-love-you

MOVE!!!

               What is your favorite verse? What gives you peace when you hear it? What changes your direction when you hear it? God gives us His Word so we are not just touched but moved - moved to follow Him. This has been on my heart for awhile now. I am not here on earth to feel good all the time; I am here to move towards God and follow Him no matter what is my path.

"Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest." -Matthew 11:28

                I do not know about you but, I love to work hard though I love to play hard. My rest maybe reading a book, talking with a friend, listening to music. I have been convicted that resting does not mean do not move and just sit on my butt. Rest means move towards God, place all your burdens on Him, rest in knowing He has my back, and continue to follow Him. When we rest in Him, we have peace no matter the battle ahead or around us.

               Knowing that God is in control at all times gives me peace and I am able to rest and trust in Him no matter what is going on. He is amazing! Rest in God - by Moving towards Him.








Source: Get a move on picture: 
http://www.ymcadallas.org/Index.cfm?FuseAction=Page&PageID=1001995

Have you ever had one of those moments where you wrestle with God back and forth?

One of my friends a couple of weeks ago called and asked me to  take over her Bible study at the Juvenile Detention Center in our county. I told them I would pray about it but as I begin to pray I already start to doubt even before I ask. Here is pretty much how my conversations went over the week...

Me: "I was like I have never lead a Bible study, I am not a leader."
And God said, "But I am."
Me: "I don't know anyone there."
And God said, "I know everyone; remember I created them".
Me: "What if the kids do not like me?"
And God said, "I didn't call you to be liked, I called for you to preach the gospel".
Me: "I am not qualified."
And God said, "How many times I do I have to say, "I don't call the qualified; I qualify the called" ."
"Ok, Yes Lord, I trust in You and what You are doing."
God, says "don't worry. I know the people better than you, I know the situations and circumstances better than you, and I know you better than you. And yet I still called you to be used by Me."

Each time we wrestle I look back and ask myself why do I do that. God is always gonna win! And Thank You God that you do!! Thank you LORD!! Much appreciated that you would use me anyways!! God is so good!!

Source:
Wrestling with God picture:
http://www.holyboastnetwork.com/profiles/blogs/wrestling-with-god

God's timing is perfect!

My sister Malissa asked me to download her pictures off her old computer that crashed that she was able to turn on last night. While watching a movie with a woman who faced infertility, I bawled and bawled. I couldn't stop crying. It was so amazing how God knows exactly what we need when we need it. He had it all planned before I even started the movie. I didn't know that one of the characters lost 3 babies and faced infertility, but God did. God's timing is perfect! Then I found a picture of my memorial flowers, so excited since my pictures were lost when last computer crashed. It's amazing how one small picture could come at the time when I needed it so much. God's timing was so perfect. Thank you Lord for sending that picture to me. Thank you for reminding that my babies
are happily with you. You always know the perfect times to remind me.
YOU are AMAZING!!!!